Just a few quick things!

I have a few reasons why I haven't posted lately. I was busy for a week with my mom's visit here to North Texas. We spent the better part of three of those days on a road trip down to the Gulf Coast to visit my sister and her husband in Galveston. It was great to see the ocean up close and personal again, and the kids had a great time playing in the surf and sand. We rode the free ferry twice, feeding the gulls, watching the dolphins play and pelicans dive. We had fun staying in a hotel and watching cable TV in bed at night. We even bought the kids each a hermit crab as their souvenirs. I was half expecting the crabs to not make it til our Labor Day departure date, but they're still alive and kicking so we may have to actually take them with us to Egypt. I plan to pack them in my carry-on luggage. I figured, I transported other invertebrates (red worms) before that way and I've read and re-read the website information of what is allowed and not allowed in carry-on's. No mention of invertebrates at all. Anyway, if they confiscate them it's not a huge tragic loss. Afterall, putting things in perspective, they are just miniature inedible lobsters hiding in snail shells. But for some reason, they are so intriguing to play with.

Since my mom left, I have been pretty occupied with packing and "last minute" shopping. Oh heck, who am I fooling, I have been last-minute shopping for the past two and a half months. But I've stepped it up this past week. My husband is really being so good about it and has already started the additional hugging and kissing of me and the kids and has pretty much resigned himself to giving me carte blanche this week. I do really feel sorrowful for him, it's always easier to be the one who leaves than the one who is left. And left alone.

We have managed to figure out a way to bridge the distance a little more. I got Vonage! What is Vonage, you may ask? Basically it's VoIP technology that gives you a portable US phone number anywhere in the world. You just hook it up to a DSL connection. (no, I am not getting paid for this advertisement) I already have my (817 area code/ local to North Texas) phone number assigned to me, but I haven't yet given it out. I am afraid of "jinxing" this thing so I'm waiting until I get it all set up in Cairo before I start surprise-calling people. I got the unlimited US calling plan for just $25 a month. We figured out, that in itself saves Mahmoud money compared to how much he was already paying to talk with me every month, (about $40, talking twice a week, using VoIP calling cards.) It will be a local call for him to call me in Egypt. We are also getting DSL here at the house in North Texas, but it won't arrive until after I depart for Egypt. Anyway, so those are some pretty exciting changes! Wow- this summer, we've gotten a DVD player and Netflix, a new computer, two new DSL lines, a new digital camera and a Vonage box/ account for me! We are SOOO high tech! Now we just need to get Mahmoud to go cellular. ;-) Nah, it'll never happen.

Dad- regarding your comments to my last post (why God created us human/ imperfect), I would encourage you to watch Jeffrey Lang's video if you haven't yet. That's pretty much exactly what it addresses. I just like the way he thinks and organizes his thoughts.

Alicia- you commented that God does not judge, God does not forgive. I don't know but I think that it's something we'll never be able to grasp in this life. God has ultimate complete knowledge. In our tiny little fraction of that, we are able sometimes to surpass the NEED of having to forgive, just by totally understanding the situation, both sides of it, all emotions involved, and just feel complete love for the parties who are wronging each other or us. For example, sometimes my child does something that would quickly anger others. But the more information I have about the child's history, all components to the situation and his personality, etc, the more I understand about the reaction, and less I get angry. I don't even need to forgive because I never felt wronged. Does that make sense? But, as a Muslim, I do believe that God DOES forgive because He himself told us that through His message to mankind. He forgives those who ask/ repent, and also those who don't ask. Sometimes people just do selfish things and don't even realize the consequences of their actions. I have been thinking about that for the last two or three days actually. Sometimes a very small thing to you can be a very big thing to someone else. Both in a positive or negative way. Stopping by your neighbor's house and driving them with you to the supermarket might not really take any extra time or money for you, but may be a HUGE thing to them if they have no other way to get there. Or talking on the cell phone while you're driving may seem like a small thing to you because you don't realize you are driving erratically but you cause the person behind you to swerve, causing a major accident. Would it be fair if God held you accountable for all the people injured or killed in such an accident? I don't think so because you didn't even realize what you were doing. He forgives. Just like a parent forgives spilled milk.

Another example is Iran. Some people might say, Why don't they just comply and get rid of those nuclear weapons!? In my mind, they have every right to have them as much as we do. What makes it ok for SOME countries to have rights that other countries don't? I understand Iran, I don't even have to forgive them because I understand their point of view, and I don't think they're doing anything wrong. If we want them to not make nuclear weapons, we need to set the precedent and get rid of ours.

I noticed that some people end a lot of their stories with "I just don't get it" or "I don't understand". I think this is a form of affirmation. When you keep saying, "I just don't understand it/ them/ her/ you" you resign yourself to not understanding and you make that decision to maintain the misunderstanding. I think a goal for all people is to, instead, ask ourselves, How can I understand this? How can I make excuses/ give reasons for that behavior or situation? Can I relate to those human reactions, or emotions? Is there anything that might make me react the same way? This can be hard because it takes a lot of honesty, but it's nice because you can keep your honesty private and not expose your vulnerabilities. Once you start on the path of understanding small things, you start to tell yourself, Oh! I do understand now, I get it, I get it, and then the more you tell yourself how much you understand, the more you believe you can/ will/ do understand and the more you will comprehend. And in my book, understanding is akin to love.

Careful, Ruth, you're sounding very Christian

Muslims and Christians are REALLY not very different. The basic difference is that Christians believe that Jesus (peace be upon him) was divine, and/or, God in the flesh. Muslims believe that Jesus was a prophet, a human like you or I, but with God-given talents and gifts. Christians see Mohammed (peace be upon him) as a historical figure while Muslims see Mohammed as God's final prophet and messenger to mankind. Generally speaking, fundamentalist Christians and fundamentalist Muslims follow the same moral code and have many of the same beliefs about the way this world, and the Hereafter, works, with some slight discrepancies. So... a Muslim's ideas are very often going to have a great deal of overlap with a Christian's. So quite often, I'm going to "sound Christian". (Kinda misleading, my name being Ruth and all.) But it is also a point-of-view thing. To me, sometimes Christians sure do sound very Muslim.

I'm lucky to live 3 months of the year on a little cul-de-sac in North Texas. Two of my neighboring families are good people, and practicing Christians that I really admire and feel safe and proud to live around. Oddly enough, both those women have daughters my age but I feel more in the same "league" with them than I do usually with women in their 30's. They probably think that's cute or something. Anyway, I was talking to one of them yesterday and our conversation again verified that 1.) no, I'm not the only one appalled at some things going on and condoned here in American society and 2.) practicing Christians and praciticing Muslims have the same hopes, dreams, values, expectations and manners. We both feel sadness and frustration over unwed teenage mothers, and divorce of so many families these days, and over what's being shown on television. As I stood out on the lawn, watching my sprinkler water our grass that her fiance installed for us, I didn't think of us as a Muslim woman talking to a Christian woman. I just saw us as two good people, trying to live righteously, being good neighbors to one another.

I don't think I've ever known a Jehovah's Witness but my father relates this:

I've been having discussions with a Jehovah's Witnesses couple and their explanation (which I largely agree with) is "Lasting peace will never be achieved on earth as long as Satan rules the Earth."

I, as a Muslim, don't think that Satan "rules" the Earth. Doesn't God have Supreme Power over the Earth and the Heavens and everything between them? But God did permit Satan to enter into our world and try to tempt us into being arrogant. So I do think that Satan will ALWAYS be trying to influence people's hearts and minds until the end of time when our judgement starts. And I do believe that God did create mankind to be weak, and that some of us will fully succomb to Satan's whisperings and all of us will succomb to those whisperings SOMETIMES (because none of us is perfect). That could turn into a big theological debate- "Why did God create man to be weak?" which I have the answer to but probably not the audience. :-)

To further elaborate- yes, Satan can give us evil thoughts and sometimes we really can't control that and as a muslim, I believe we are NOT held accountable for our thoughts, or our feelings. We ARE held accountable for our words and actions, however. But it not only takes INTENTION to turn those thoughts into actions, it also takes WILL. God gave each of us a WILL to choose what thoughts we want to act on. This is what seperates us from animals. (Well, one thing that seperates us anyway.) We may have urges and yet, refrain from acting on them. We might even have bad intentions, yet still control ourselves, and not act on them and still not cause harm. In fact, to my Muslim mind, that is where the greatest reward lies. Wanting to do evil, but choosing not to. Self restraint. Huge source of brownie points right there. Or put another way, if you decide your intention is to always make your Creator pleased with you, and put that above any other goal, then your actions will follow that intention. You have flexed your will.

How can religious men participate in violence?

This entry is mostly a response to my sister's comments. I was going to reply to her in a private email but then I thought maybe what I will write will be interesting to someone else as well.

Pride and ego can and do corrupt mankind. They can make a person, or country, think that they are more deserving of life, happiness, property, etc than the "other". In turn, this causes the egotistical party to disregard the rights of the "other". And oppression ensues. Is peaceful resistance the correct reaction to oppression? In some situations, I see that it is beneficial and the best choice. Martin Luther King, Jr. and Ghandi not only needed to stand up for minority rights, but they also wanted to change public opinion. But as far as I recall, neither of those situations were dealing with smart bombs and missiles. A missile does not care if you sit quietly and protest. It doesn't have a conscience. Israel has said that they will not cease until Hezbollah is rooted out. Well, that's not really an option. That's like saying to the US, ok, well you have to give up your Independent Party, and then we'll stop attacking you. Israel has stated, in so many words, that it really doesn't matter what Lebanon does, they will keep attacking. So peaceful resistance doesn't seem to help the situation here. It would only lead to more civilian casualties, namely innocent Lebanese civilians. It's not going to slow down the slaughtering process. Suicide in any form is against God's Law. You must always take action to return justice to the world.

A country has the right to defend itself against outside attacks. A strong person must prevent oppression of those who can't defend themselves. That is an obligation God put on us. The able must help the disabled. Maybe no one else remembers, but the Prime Minister of Lebanon, even almost in tears, has pleaded several times for intervention, and everyone just stands by with their hands tied. The Lebanese do not want to be fighting this war.

It's been said by some "wise" man that Israel has the right to defend itself. Does Lebanon not have that right? Who is the one being attacked, anyway? Who is the one trying to defend themselves?

Recognizing and validating the right to life and peaceful existence is paramount to each individual, no matter where they live on the Earth. Every American needs to start to appreciate and respect every other human as his own relative and in turn treat them as equals. Global change starts on a local level. But... doing so would ultimately disrupt the consumeristic lifestyle of 95% of Americans and when people feel something in their wallet, they tend to feel it less in their heart. Their values waver as they weigh the personal consequences of their actions. Yah someone should feed all those Africans... but I really need that money to pay my car payment so it'll have to be someone else, sorry. American economy and society is built on breaking things and then offering a temporary solution so that money is spent and "earned" and that's what makes the world go round. Hey, start (or encourage or condone) a war and then sell weapons to both sides. Great way to get rich. It's been going on for centuries. There is corruption in the world and the higher you get up on the ladder, the harder it is to get back down.

Yes, each human on the Earth needs to humble himself and realize he is not innately any better than anyone else on the face of the Earth. Regardless of race, color, nationality, personal preferences, etc. If everyone did this and lived in a state of mutual respect, yes, we would acheive world peace. However, there is a force that whispers into men's ears and incites arrogance. That force will never cease, and humans will always be weak and some will always succomb to it. People will always be arrogant and always try to violate the rights of others, and that is why there will never be world peace. And because there will always be violaters, good people will always need to stand up for the oppressed, even if it means killing in defense.

“Why isn't Lebanon doing more to oust the "rebel" Hezbollah?”

This is a (very valid) question my sister asked me (see her comments re: my last post). Well, first I think there is a big public misunderstanding (thanks to the US Media and Condi Rice, oh yah, and our friends in Israel) as to what exactly Hezbollah is.

First, from Wikipedia: (www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hezbollah)

The Hezbollah or Hizbollah (Arabic: حزب الله‎ Hizbu-llāh,[1] meaning Party of God) is a Shi’a Islamist organization and political party in Lebanon,[2][3] comprising a military and a civilian arm,[4] whose principal stated goal is to defend Southern Lebanon against present or future Israeli occupation.[5] Within Lebanon and the Muslim world, Hezbollah is widely regarded as a legitimate resistance group,[6] but the United States, Canada, and Israel deem it a terrorist organization.

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Anyone else notice in Wiki’s definition how it’s only just US, Canada and Israel that deems Hezbollah as a terrorist organization? Guys, we’re outnumbered again. That always tells ya something. Either it means you’re a genius or … not. Or that you have a vested interest in “misunderstanding”. Poor Canada, how’d they get thrown in there with the likes of US.

Now, I’m not the most politically minded person, and God help me when it comes to History and Geography (I WAS a science major, after all) but I do watch Meet the Press and Jim Lehrer and stuff like that (including the occasional Al Jazeera- oh my god! Shoot me now! I’m a traitor!) and I have a pretty smart husband who actually knows dates of wars and stuff. And to top it off, I speak a bit of Arabic. Anyway, a “hizb” means a part or what we can call here a party (as in a political party, not as in a toga party although that conjurs up funny images) and to me, “hizb” has a bit of religious significance because the Qur’aan is divided into 30 sections, called juz, and each juz is divided into two hizb. So a hizb is 1/60th of the Qur’aan. Anyway, that was an aside to blantantly brag about how much I know (cough cough). And we all know what “Allah” means (but when it’s joined with different words, “Allah” can change to “illah” or “ullah” but that’s getting into grammar of the Arabic language and we don’t need to know that right now) Sooo… Hezbollah means exactly Allah’s Party. Just like in America, where we have the Democratic Party, the Republican Party and the Independent Party (what is Leiberman running as ANYWAY), Lebanon (who my Egyptian husband describes and the most sophisticated and educated people in the middle east) has different political parties, too. Hezbollah is one of them. So “ousting” them is like “ousting” the Republican party. Hey… not a bad idea when you come to think of it. Maybe that should be Tony Blair’s offer- we’ll help you oust Hezbollah but only if we get to oust the HezbRepublique, too. I mean, as long as we’re getting rid of terrorists, right?

I'm Baaaack...

WOW, I can not believe it. I figured out how to access my own blog again. Yippee. Yes, I admit it, I'm not really good with technology, what can I say. I expect my computer to remember my passwords, but then when I travel, and use a new computer.... how can I access anything?? Anyway, I haven't written for 3 months?! A lot has happened, I guess. I'll just ramble aimlessly for a while to update anyone who is out there reading about my life.

First, I'm currently in Texas for the summer months. So I'm Ruthie Of Maadi In Texas, I guess. We're all physically much more comfortable here since we have an air conditioned home and air conditioned cars and air conditioned shopping. Although I feel conflicted about that because I'm not sure that air conditioning is actually good for your health. But then, if it helps you avoid heat exhaustion, I guess it can't be too bad for your health.

My kids are enjoying the best that Texas has to offer. Bowling, ice skating, playing my the kids of my friend, PuttPutt mini golf, swimming, parks, sprinklers, cheap movie theater movies, weekly trips to the library (we got The Corpse Bride and Color of Paradise on DVD yesterday- for free! gotta love the US library system) We joined Netflix so we usually have at least one DVD in the house to watch and that has become pretty much our regular evening activity as a family. We watched "Master and Commander" last night starring Russell Crowe. I'd give it 3 out of 5 stars. A little dull and the kids opted to go play Spy Fox on the computer instead while their dad and I suffered through the slow parts of the movie while Mahmoud kept making random comments on how it's amazing how life would just grind to a halt without computers these days. (Not sure if he was even paying attention to the movie, but see, I was listening, dear.) Actually, come to think of it, I might give it 2 out of 5 stars.

I generally try to avoid watching the news on TV because it just upsets me. I feel frustrated over the situation in Lebanon. Actually I feel frustrated over the lack of international response and action to make Israel stop. It's like all the kids on the playground standing around watching a bully pummeling that "moslem" kid and no one doing anything about it. In this analogy, I'm just an ant, so what can I do? I know, never underestimate the power of prayer.

Last night after Russell Crowe completed his attempt to lull us to sleep, we found Charlie Rose on PBS interviewing the CEO of Walmart. After listening to the interview, I feel better about shopping at Walmart. Did you know 90% of Americans over pay and that Walmart actually sells some items below cost just to match competitor's prices? Wow. Well, it sounded amazing at 11:45pm last night anyway.

I've been kicking into gear reading books of tips for teachers and stocking up on supplies for the coming school year. I am nervously excited to go back to teaching. Actually I am really looking forward to it but I always have a fear of failure, but that's probably what will motivate me to go the extra mile. That's all for today! Gotta get a move on and memorize my last ayat for this afternoon's halaqa.